sotobas_lot

[She's in her homeworld; the smaller cuts have since been healed, but she's still missing one horn and sporting a pretty demolished arm Yet, she shows no concern for the injuries, and they seem to be healing as she speaks. She notices the crossed out text, wondering if he does not need her help after all..] ...I am here,Ozaki Toshio.

[Cigarette in place, leaning back in his chair more for the lack of energy to sit up straight than any sense of relaxation, he sits and stares for a full minute which seems longer when waiting before exhaling, doing his best to pull himself into some semblance of normalcy and clicking on the video.]

You're... Still in tough shape. [But, better shape than she had been. He's really not sure whether he feels relieved, guilty, or concerned.]

[That pause before he speaks, before he speaks to her, with or without that cigarette, is something to which she's grown accustomed. She has a high tolerance for pain--and just like when she fights, when she experiences it she is silent.] I am, I am.....And...

how are you?

Better, perhaps, with less responsibiltiy, certainly,without me?

Edited 2011-12-19 01:06 (UTC)

Less responsibility? [He takes a drag off of his cigarette, leaning back further, looking straight up to the ceiling and allowing the smoke to form a vertical stream into the air before giving a bitter smirk. That's one way to put a silver lining on the decreasing number of villagers: fewer people to be responsible for.

He looks back down to the screen again, setting the cigarette back in place between his lips.]

I'm not so cold a man that I'd consider you being beaten and bloodied out of commission any kind of improvement.

[That...surprises her. It's her turn to stay silent for longer than a moment.] My presence was not, even in a better condition,ever an improvement from whatyou surely could accomplish

on your own.

[Basically saying the same situstion in Sotoba would have happened even without her being there--at least, it seems that way to her, if he has Kefka. So really, what is her use?]

Well, that might be true... But, that can be said of anybody here. Me included.

Probably the only thing that's changed their movements at all is a fear of what would happen if 20 or 30 people instead of 2 or 3 took action against them...

Heh, threatening to pull in that many might have been my mistake...

[...He threatened them?] What has happened there...Ozaki Toshio?

... [How to answer that? That's a complicated question. Still, if he wants help, he should say something. Instead, he huffs out a bitter laugh.] ..Surprisingly little now that I think about it.

I wanted to surround them and to keep any of them from escaping and doing this somewhere else, but they have the advantage in numbers, now... In more ways than one.

[With the arm that hasn't been damaged, she points directly at him, to his chest.] A fragile cage of rib bones protects your heart, protects your life.

I am only an extra shield,

yet I would want to be more

than bones, than breakable life,

if you would trust meto break those of the okiagari....and if you would trust meto support you.[In other words, she only acted more or less than a shield to him; a shield that's failed on more than one account. If she's going to be a tool, she would much prefer the offensive than defensive. But...she knows that if that can't be done, she should at least try to help him with himself, with all this unnecessary stress he's going through. She supposes he's not the type to ask for help directly, so once again she must offer it. Who knows if he will accept. ] Let me help you once again,let me return to your world.

Edited 2011-12-23 21:57 (UTC)

That's...

[He stares at the ceiling for a few more moments, wondering if he should really fuss over the wording. He's not sure when he started to think of her as sensitive, and he's not one to fuss over matters of pride and propriety--that's best left to the monks, but it's probably an important clarification never the less.]

I'm the one asking you. Come back and help me.

[Oh, yes. Sometimes she can be as sensitive as she is insensitive. When he speaks she taken aback for a moment. She opens her mouth to respond, but then has to allow herself enough time to spit out a broken tooth, wiping the blood off her lips with her hand.] Truly? [She would go back in an instant, if it meant another chance to be able to help.] ...Of course, of course.

I will return...

if you are certain I should.

I need you whether you should be here or not. [Now that he's started, it's suddenly easier, even if his tone is bitter and self-derisive. How can he be this selfish when she's looking like that? For injuries like that, a hospital is best; even if he can wrap a few things or offer pain killers, he knows his small clinic isn't suited for cases like this.

It's much better for her to be at home.

But then, her own home is where that happened in the first place.

Not much of what happened even makes sense, and there's nothing he could do if it did, much like the current situation. So isn't it wrong to entangle himself further into it? Saying to himself that he's doing a kindness by letting himself be open with his need is just an excuse.

He's a pathetic enough man that it makes him give out a bitter laugh.] ...But, a doctor's place isn't a bad idea if you're looking for someplace after being attacked like that.

[Dead Master wonders what he could actually do to help her. Not much--but surely he must know that, which makes her believe his statement at the end is just something extra. Still, is it possible that even he wants to feel that he's worth something, that he can help her in some little way? She stops...wondering what to say next. Then again--isn't it better to do something at this point? Gingerly, she lifts up her ruined arm.] Perhaps a bandage of some sort. [Hey, it was worth a shot, so she offers a small smile back. She shares this extra excuse to return to his world as well. But...all she needed him to say was that it was fine for her to return and she would. In her mind, that's what a good person would do, and she was tying to be one.]Although I do believe...

you are the one who

needs more care than I. [Because he did seem more exhausted than ever.] I will be there soon...[And worldhopping now! First time for everything. Her feed ends and in a moment or two she appears behind him, dripping blood and shadow where she stands, but standing nonetheless.]

[He thought he would be more shocked. He was more shocked when he first saw how injured she was on video; in person, it's more real, but somehow easier to deal with, the fact that she is standing, that she is alive, that nothing is hidden is more tangible. Blood isn't so terrifying when it's real; it's symbolic in a picture or a video.

That's not to say his eyes don't widen temporarily, but he can work with reality, standing from his chair and motioning for her to take it as he moves to one of the cabinets on the wall.]

Sit. [Any medical aid he offers is going to be completely useless, and both of them must know this, but if he's going to beg and demand she help him, he can be at least as pushy in helping her. Doctors can't force their patients into anything, but they can be exceedingly pushy and throw their authoritative weight around. It's a right that comes with the territory, the opposite side of being expected to handle and fix everything.]

[She doesn't take his tone of voice as any authority--to her this is how he always speaks. Nevertheless, she sits in the provided chair, crossing her ankles as she waits. It usually doesn't take long for her to heal, but her exhaustiveness naturally makes it much more effortful to take care of herself. But she thinks she's done something good. Even if she believes this is simply routine for him, even if banadges are uselesa, having her injuries tended for is a novel experience. In the meantime, she supposes she must explain a part of why she left...] I only wishedto check on my pet.[A giant dragon-centipede, that is. And with one of her kind named 'Dragon Slayer', anyone would be worried. Of course, the other reason why she left was because she didn't feel like she was much use or help....but if he asked for her back, she wouldn't mention such a thing.]

[All it can be is a novelty. He did see the fight. If she could survive that, anything he could do is certainly useless. Still, stopping up the blood is surely better than having her bleed out more while recovering by whatever means she is using. Realistically, those wounds should be stitched, and that's completely ignoring the internal damages that should be checked. The absurdity of it all is like slapping a bandaid on a broken knee. He stops short on gathering the bandages with a sigh. It feels as useless as running a blood test on a tired, listless patient these days.]

And, what was that girl who attacked you?

Black Gold Saw...is one of my kind.[She's wanted a fight with Saw since she found out that Saw dealt catastrophic injuries to someone she really cares about. But at that time, she had been blinded. In someone else's presence, having one sense lost in her world would virtually mean an automatic loss. Saw's ruthless and strong, which is why she does what she wants, leaving the others to take care of stagnated souls.] You need notconcern yourself with her.

[If he had the ability to do anything about Black Gold Saw, he muses that he'd be able to spout off some shounen manga heroic line like that of course it's something he should concern himself with, as long as he's concerned for her. With a bitter smile at his inability to deliver such a line, he stops short in front of her with a roll of bandages, musing at the absurdity of concerning himself with her injuries. With Okiagari, or Shiki, or whatever they're calling themselves these days.

It'd be easy to fall into Nihilism with such slippery slopes. So, he'll at least cut himself off from that by declaring his right to be concerned with injuries as a doctor, no matter how ridiculous.]

Not with her, but given that I am your doctor, I can be concerned about her.

[She glances at the bandages he holds as he approaches, and then at her arm that's already started to heal. They're wounds kept open only by her own exhaustedness-- really, she should have been healed by now. There really isn't anything to explain about Saw. She wouldn't call it boredom; boredom is for those that count time, and their kind certainly doesn't do that. Dead Master herself only started to be concerned about time when she first encountered the community. Practice, maybe--but Saw didn't need to practice. Fun, perhaps? Saw likes fighting. They all do. Saw knows Dead Master's formidable, but she probably was disappointed in that fight. So she couldn't control her, but--] No, no...I shall be more

careful in the future.

[It had been her fault, after all, for wanting vengeance and turning him human. And now that she had a worldhop, she could ensure that she wouldn't be going back to her world whenever she loses sight.]

[In the end, the bandages get set down on the computer table, unused. At the very least, he owes her more than a formality of unnecessary medical care, obligated by his job. Fumbling towards kindness shouldn’t mean getting caught up in symbolism for its own sake. Maybe it is nihilism, the inability to find a meaning or a drive to do anything for her due to its inherent meaninglessness, that wins out. Maybe it’s just the sweet relief of surrender on that front, the front of trying, that makes it easy to smile, something he couldn’t do naturally for what felt like months now.

With that smile that comes so easily it feels hollow instead of natural, he reaches out as if to pat her on the head.

That motion, too, stops short. Doesn’t it feel too condescending from the one who needs the help, who can’t do anything in return? His hand hovers, then finally just moves to take out a cigarette instead.]
I won’t discourage preventative measures, but you can’t blame yourself for every ailment that comes your way.

[If he applied the bandage, she would have thought it silly overall. The almost-pat on her head is reminiscent of how he did the same motion when she was under the control of that virus. She is under the impression he only thinks of her as a child. It's a ridiculous thing, to judge or underestimate someone based on their appearance...or their gender. But that, too, can be human. There he goes, fishing for another cigarette. She glacnes up at him, expression mostly blank. She supposed that if he's not going to be bandaging her arm, they may be done here. The girl stands. But what he says--.] May I remind you that your words apply to youas well. [--that he shouldn't blame himself for everything that happens. Here the wings on her back extend, and for a moment she simply hovers before her own hand moves to pat his head. The action is completely silent, over as soon as it began.]

Edited 2012-01-09 20:35 (UTC)

[As she rises, he seeks a lighter in his lab coat pocket, only to stop short, looking up as she floats. Looking wasn't anything special; eye contact was natural, and even with everything on the community, in the village, someone spreading their wings and using them to fly is still something miraculous enough.

Ah. Even with her horns, even with bat like wings, even covered in blood and dressed in tattered black, one ridiculous perception forms in his mind: in that moment, she looks nothing short of angelic.

It may be timed to seem a surprised reaction to having his head pat but it's that thought that shocks him into going slack-jawed. As she pats his head, the cigarette drops from his lips, lighter uselessly in hand as he stares up at her.]

[She steps lightly back onto the ground. She hopes what she said back to him got through, even if he statement was basically a 'speak for yourself' type of sentiment. Still, would like confirmation if he actually listened or is simply preparing an argument in his mind.] It is true, Ozaki Toshio,

it is true.

[And she waits patiently for him to say something.]

[As she lowers, his eyes go to the cigarette on the floor. With a defeated sigh, he moves to pick it up, still fully intent to smoke it and not about to let one moment of slack jawed confusion (or was it awe?) get in the way.] The difference is that it’s a doctor’s job to be bothered by other’s ailments.

That's definitely true, but more importantly--] And it is not even 'job'

as a friend.
There is no need

to justify giving care, to say that
it is a duty.[Because friendship and caring for someone should come naturally. Because she said she'd be his friend, but looking back...maybe it seems like quite a while ago for him. So take it, this reminder of a friendship speech.]

You can still spend Christmas with us. It might be a good chance for you to rest.

Christmas is more of a party than a break.

It can be a break, if you prefer.

Making it a day to sit on your ass doing nothing isn't very festive.

It doesn't have to be that big or that small. I'm not sure how Christmas is celebrated normally but if you don't want to spend it with us, spend a quiet evening with your family and friends there. I'm sure the nurses you were working with would enjoy it.

No. I think if the Christian holiday is celebrated with anybody, the community would be the best... We're a bunch of heathens who've turned on the Baptism of Reason.

We have the chance to learn and see more than most people do.

Text

always video;

[Video back]

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i can read honestly

Lucky. I can only read dishonestly.

S-shut up?!?!

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